"Here's the Situation"....You're a D-Bag

I was going to attempt to do the first NBD book review in this post, but was unable to. I really intended to buy "Here's the Situation" that was just released by Jersey Shore cast member, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino. The idea was to do a book review in a mocking manner, but something happened at the end of last week: I heard The Situation talk.

I'll admit, I've seen two episodes of the Jersey Shore during the first season. I hate reality TV, and always try to lead by example by not watching that shit, but that just slipped through the cracks. I haven't watched an episode since, and just from the two episodes, I felt like I had a good handle on what "The Situation" was trying to bank on. Yes, he's a wannabe guido in Jersey trying to milk his 15 minutes of fame. But, after a radio interview, I wasn't even close to pin-pointing exactly how much of a douche bag this kid is.

I'm a hater. I have no problem admitting that I hate on people who fall ass backwards into money. But, when somebody talks about their blind-luck like they actually affected society in a positive way to gross a few million dollars a year, that's when I draw the line.

This 144 page abortion drew a crowd of thousands to a book signing last week...IN THE RAIN. I'm afraid to check the national best-seller list.

So, on the radio show he was on, they asked him what he thinks about all this hoopla on his book release.

The answer I wish he gave: "It's crazy how many people showed up. I'll just enjoy the moment while it's here and I appreciate their support for me and the Jersey Shore."

The answer he gave (from memory): "You knowwww, I really tried to target this book at the audience of the Jersey Shore to get started. Then, you knowwwww, I can expand to an autobiography or a cook book. You knowwwwww, I'd like to tell my story and what I have been through."

Watch out Steve Jobs and Bill Gates...The Situation plans on getting his foot in the door and taking over consumer markets.

So there I was staring at The Situation's book in the store, deciding if I should really go through the embarrassment of the book store clerk rolling her eyes at me when I bring it to the counter for my "mock" book review. But, in the back of my mind I just kept hearing, "You knowwwwww, c'mon Todd, just read it. You knowwwww, don't forget to pick up my cologne, workout video, best-of Jersey Shore quote book, my new upcoming clothing line, and future book releases." (I didn't make up any of that shit I just listed)

I stepped down and walked out of the store with my tail between my legs. I couldn't do it. So, I apologize to those who saw the headline and hoped there would be a book review to follow...I just couldn't go through with it.

The hate wouldn't let me give in to The Situation...not this time...not even for comedic reasons...sigghhhh.

- Diddy